This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I have post one night stand depression
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
