Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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