By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
