But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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