So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
this beer tastes like vomit already
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
