we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
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Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
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you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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