I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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