Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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