I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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