I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
