The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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