New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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