matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize