this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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