She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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