Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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