turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
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i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
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I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize