therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office