Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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