dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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