Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
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He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
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I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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