what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
