yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize