bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
