i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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