Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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