did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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