I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
