I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
she peed on how many people?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize