My nipple is on Facebook.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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