hotties wanna shake it
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?