i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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