I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
