Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
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