no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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