sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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