his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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