If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize