you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Randomize