i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
