Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize