Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
