The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
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In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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