dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize