Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize