chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
