Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
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Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
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Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?