it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
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Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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