I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
