she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize