Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
