Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
