16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Randomize
